The word "Stay" has a great deal of significance in the "Black community". We have expressions like; "Where you stay at?" "S/he stay over there." "Don't stay out all night."
Why? We are never permitted to live, as anything, but second class. We are not permitted to "live" any where. We must "stay". Stay in a hole, stay in a hut,in a shit hole country. A shack, an overpriced ghetto dwelling.
We "stay" in jail. We "stay" in bad relationships. We "stay" mad. We scream; "STAY" out my business,
A cage is considered too good for us to "stay" in.
"They" take their dogs to the groomers , but WE better not say shit about our five thousand year old "condition".
Yes, we still rank HUE-MANS by skin color, hair texture, wealth, age, and any old bullshit , some rich asshole like *rump, proclaims.
The word "Stay" means a lot to me. When I was eighteen years old, my GrandDADDY told me not to "Stay" , around my "mother". He told me to leave and NEVER COME BACK.
I never bothered to ask him why. We all knew!
While, for what ever reason, my grandfather always kept my "mother's" horrid deeds a secret, we always knew something horrid was wrong with her. Something happened to her as a small child and s/he gladly joined forces with every viper, that ever skillfully slithered , on this good Earth.
World! martha jane walters used to go down on graves collecting "goofer dust" to harm her enemies , friends and mostly family. Yes , I am a witness! martha jane walters did that shit like , s/he really thought it was ok, normal.
martha always kept an "alter", burned candles and plotted against any and everyone smarter, gifted, talented or simply helpless. mjw as a SADIST! Promiscuous, lascivious, insatible.
Most of all mathy jane hated! s/he was always angry! Was always unhappy. Always raged! Always lied! Always demanded the best and highest seats in Simon Temple, the AMEZ church , s/he "rooted" and kept hostage for over thirty years.
No world, just like *rump s/he could never be satisfied.
Yes, s/he was a slut, a part-time, any time, prostitute. I have to laugh, my "mother" convinced herself , that the fact s/he got paid for her pussy, made her brilliant, desirable.
World, my poor "mother" justified her extreme perversion by proclaiming s/he was "light bright and damn near white." That s/he could do anything because s/he was brilliant and had GOD's permission.
In twenty-twenty hindsight, mjw was never more than a "child". A child monster, unfortunately.
World, if you ever birth a child that derives sadistic pleasure from bludgeoning small animals, setting fires, lying and bullying, ....just pray, endure to the end.
The evildoers can't win.
Sure, I "Stayed" , remained my "mother's" whipping post until s/he mailed me that shit smeared letter. I knew instantly, that shit was some witchcraft! I fled , then. I went "No Contact" for nine years.
I was thirty-eight by then. So? I did fine! I THRIVED without that imp, that sadistic, narcissistic , sadistic, racist , deliberately blocking my blessings.
I told you, no evildoer can win! No one can take your Joy! If some Joy snatcher took it, snatch it back.
Sure, I "Stayed" but , I grew beyond measure.
BEAMING!!!
***THE GWEN DOSTER DIARIES***
Wednesday, January 13. 2021
Wednesday, January 13. 2021
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